My sister and I are tag-team tending to my mom as she goes through the stages of Alzheimer’s. Sometimes it can be incredibly frustrating to spend time with her. The "looping" stories - how many times can you hear about how she first saw the mountains?, the forgotten appointments - really? I just told you we were going to the dentist, the financial issues - yes, Mom, you do have money. I just put forty dollars in your wallet. I promise myself I'll be positive, I really do. But often, in the face of the repeated stories and jobs made more difficult because of her "help," I'm challenged to keep that promise. Yeah, sometimes I'm not my best self. I have to remember that:
- Despite the fact that many Alzheimer's patients become cranky and even combative, Mom has stayed remarkably pleasant and kind.
- She has been able to make some good friends at the assisted living center where she now lives. She's even learned their names.
- There is still plenty of money in her accounts to care for her for several years to come. What a blessing that her finances allow for good care.
- The repeated stories are worse when we're alone. Around new people and new situations she's less likely to "loop."
- She's agreeable. I spent much of the summer taking her to various dentist and doctor appointments to get her caught up. She would happily go along with me even though she had no idea where we were going or for what.
- And, like Dorie, she might have extreme short-term memory problems, but she's also extremely optimistic. She tells everyone that she's doing just fine. And her memory is great!
1 comment:
That's a tough one. Old age is the shits and that's all there is to it. You try and make the best of it, and seems like you're doing great at that. Much love to you.
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